November 2005

The Archives

11.17.05

Habitual Myopic Formations Ego Trippin | (0)

I wonder at what point did I start to accept parameters on my hustle on the strength that my commitment to a certain format on my lifestyle just becomes a given. When I married my wife I subscribed to the notion that there would be eventually be children in my hustle, or the fact that our next home purchase would have to be bigger; and what about money? For the most part my hustle has always just been to trump up as much as possible to support the lifestyle that my format must be. I simply gave in to these fabrications and hardcoded them into my format because I believed thats how you should get down.

Lately, I’ve been challenging these pre-determined fates. How about no lil’ soldiers running around? or what about selling the condo and one of the cars and securing a comfortable one bedroom with a view? Until recently, I never even considered living overseas, but it’s been on my mentals for a few days. Obviously you can change your format so your hustle can always be different, but if you had the chance, would you? Or, would you flop like a fish out of water and only dream on choosing your own adventure? TRUTH? The greatest adventure is the chance you’d never take — the one where you bust that comfort bubble and fabricate a new hustle.
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11.13.05

Lost in the Snow Crash Ego Trippin | (3)

I’ve been spending as much time as possible trying to recover from this stress induced kung-FU that my stomach has been on since last Monday. With that in mind I figured it was a solid opportunity to reconnect with some cyberpunk literature in my library and Neil Stephenson’s, “Snow Crash“. It’s been a hot minute since I’ve read the novel and I settled in knowing I would enjoy the scenario.

After a couple hours of reading, I get to the bottom of page 186. The main characters whole hustle has just taken an interesting turn and on the next page, PROBLEMS. At this point, I’m sitting up in the bed, confused by the fact that my brain was just disconnected from the metaverse that I was comfortably immersed in.

Since my format has been slightly delusional and hallucinatory at times these past few days I lay back down and try to convince myself that i’m just trippin’. I start rereading the bottom of page 186 and move on to the next page and again I run up against black ice the size of Texas. WHAT? just happened? (note: words escape my lips verbally before I realize it happened). Page 186 took a solid jump to page 211. Just under thirty pages of intel is missing from my paperback copy.
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11.10.05

Urgent Hustle Maneuvers Ego Trippin | (2)

If I could mastermind a stress free hustle, I’m certain I’d be a professional bum. I’m not talking about rolling with an indigent type format, but something more stress free than I’m apparently living right now. Every superman has his kryptonite, but on the strength, please believe my moniker MUST be The StressMan.

I consider my format solid enough to handle stress at a high level, in big volume, and with ease. Thats my mentals coming at you right there. Time and again the body fails me. Especially my stomach. My enemies camped around me could be rallying right now if they knew my struggle. Why can the body really dictate your hustle and all that you do?

The fact that stress so easily manifests itself physically forces me to do more than pause. Life must not have been on the same track I perceived; sharp pains to my sides splicing through my thinking it’s all good. TRUTH? Taking inventory and monitoring the stress factor must be the out I’m looking for.

Man, I have to be about something at this point or I’m going to fall. I’m in orbit right now and I’m waiting for some sure footing before my touchdown.